probably the wrong “somewhere”

slow-building, mundane pressures push me into a mold I don't like. voices, high and low, talk me into a corner I didn't choose. God's tireless chisel crumbles me into a shape I don't understand. my desires fracture and fly out from me in all directions. the path winds, and wanders, and fades into the blank... Continue Reading →

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one more chance

i cannot change the world, i cannot heal it, i cannot even fathom it. i am glad that i cannot understand. if i could, i imagine i would only cradle my head in my hands. i thank you God for my light yoke, for my small piece of the puzzle. i am sorry for my... Continue Reading →

please

in the blackness all I have is Your hand so don't pat me on the head and tell me it will all be all right don't shrink my head and tell me to try harder don't tell me I'm not enough don't tell me I'm just fine tell me the truth take me away lead... Continue Reading →

sinker

I carry it with me wherever I go this heavy, heavy thing that indebts every breath demands every waking second withholds sleep and denies me all rest I carry it with me into the quiet places into the busy peopled places into the secret places all my own wherever I am, there it is this... Continue Reading →

Yours

I remember as a child the afternoon sky growing dark as twilight beneath the shadow of summer thunderheads, and dashing out to play in fields of tall yellow grass and crackling bracken. breathing air thick with the smell of storm, drinking wind that fretted the wilted heads of wild flowers, I and the whole earth... Continue Reading →

simplify me, please

simplify me, please. my heart is a rope knotted and tied tight, my strength is a pit bull frothing on a choke chain, my mind is a heavy, ticking machine of unfathomable purpose. simplify me, please. gather up these scattered shreds of me and set them alight, turn them to smoke in the gentle breeze... Continue Reading →

in Your eyes

who was I in Your eyes before I ever took a breath? what was my first blue print, first draft, first sketch? is my loose-tied frame still hung on Your intention? or has my heart fallen deep into a cage of my invention? am I to fly arrow-true the desired path of Your sight? or... Continue Reading →

you can’t take my name

you'll never make me break 'cause you can't take my name. you can't conceive of a God that you could never tame. and you can't take my soul and you can't take my song. you might beat me down but you will never prove me wrong. I'll never be your toy. I'll never be your... Continue Reading →

sorry

God, forgive me for shattering myself against You. or rather the graven image I made for You, shaped with all the tongue-biting concentration of a two-year-old with her first crayon. You were trying to say something to the world when You made me, something about joy and grace. but these days I'm afraid all I... Continue Reading →

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